HYSTERIA
*The reason the root word "hyster" refers to the womb is derivative of the word "hysteria" based on the sexist assumption that the womb itself caused uncontrollable, emotional behavior.
I am alive.
I am a healthy woman
I am breath.
I am free.
I am angry.
I am healed.
I hate you.
I am scared.
I am fucking tired.
I am alive.
I am mother.
I am wife.
I am Lisa.
I am the same Lisa as I used to be.
I am living.
I am dying.
I am bound.
I am free.
I am water.
I am fire.
I am healthy.
I am so fucking tired of feeling dizzy.
I want to be free.
I want to know beauty.
I want a re-awakening.
I am dead.
I am earth.
I am goddess.
I am listless.
I am Lisa Etter.
I am taking my blood pressure.
I am 134/84.
I am 180/110.
I am 122/95.
What the hell am I?
I am lost.
I have lost Lisa.
I am held.
I want my dad to be alive.
Fuck
Fuck
Fuck
I want holy baptism.
I want Eucharist.
I
I
I
I
I
I
I
I
I
I
are my feet swollen with blood?
my ankles?
are my kidneys failing?
as I ran into the fountain I left this behind.
or so I thought.
this fear of death
this fear of life
this fear of suffering
this fear of not knowing him or her one more day.
locate me. surrond me. plunge me into the abyss of this earth.
unearth me now
good God I beg
of thee to grasp my hand
I have been chasing memories down like a hunter with a loaded gun for years.
